where did you stop for lunch? Anything good out that way?

We got out of the area before stopping. We just hit up a Which Wich in Addison.

I like the gyro wich. They have good ice there too.

Supposedly NASCAR is going to fix one of my biggest problems with their act: the start times.

Ten years ago an east coast race started at noon here. Turn on the TV at noon and a minute in, you'd get the command to start engines. No stupid concerts, no interviewing all 43 drivers before the race. You knew they were throwing the green at 12:10 or so.

Now? I can't figure out when a damn race actually begins and usually go looking for something else to occupy my time or fall asleep. The DMN says that today's race in Fontana, California starts at 2:15. Come on. They aren't throwing the green at 12:15 their time. I'll kiss your ass if it starts before 3:00.

I read the other day where NASCAR is going back to earlier start times next year. If this is true, it's a good thing.

They have other issues to fix, but this is a start.

They threw the green at 2:35, but I ain't kissing anything.

Somebody please make the Fontana track go way. Who thought it was a good idea to have two races at Fontana? Let's see if I can figure out why...still looking...here it is: the track is owned indirectly by NASCAR. One of the France family is CEO. Bill France Sr. founded the company. What a bunch of crap. Take this race away and give it to some other track. Please. Just one more reason why NASCAR is losing cred with its fans.

Jimmie Johnson won today's boring race and took over the points lead from my hero Mark Martin.

Last week's race was at Charlotte, one of the better tracks on the circuit and it's 45 years old now. It's the original tri-oval track and Texas is configured the same way.

But ratings are worse than ever for this race. NASCAR got beat by freaking playoff baseball, which often sucks hind tit on all sports ratings.

Some might say that Jimmie Johnson dominating and winning caused this race to be uninteresting. If I'd had a choice, I would have watched college football instead. I had a gig so I couldn't watch anything.

Once the season is over, I'll bore you all with the analysis of the four things that detractors say are bringing the "sport" down.

Hoob.

Was laying on the couch Sunday and flipped over to see what was going on at Martinsville, a great track. Jimmie Johnson was dominating. Changed back over to football, then fell asleep.

Jimmie finished second but widened his lead over Mark Martin.

Like the rest of America, I am not interested.

I think it's great that Jimmy's excelled in his new career since he and Jerry parted ways...

What in the world. Today's race in Talladega has a scheduled noon start. They are singing the National Anthem at 12:02.

So how's the Danica Patrick of NASCAR doing? Has he won anything yet or is he still living off of his beheaded daddy's carcass?

More of the same. His teammates are in the top 5 in the chase and he blows up nearly every week. And I'm loving it.

I looked up the standings. He's 24th, but probably still first in endorsements. The redneck is an amazing and intriguing animal.

What a crazy mess of a race at the end of the Talladega event. Jimmie Johnson never threatened and still finished 8th, widening his lead. This reaaaaly pisses off his haters.

In separate wrecks, Ryan Newman and Mark Martin both ended up on their heads. Newman's spill was really bad in that it pushed his roll cage down onto his helmet and his car had to be rolled over to get the poor sumbitch out.

I haven't gained the details on this, but some are saying that Jimmie was cussing Mark's driving on the radio after Newman's wreck.

Junior finished 10th, pretty good for him. Martin finished 28th, making Hoob sad.

Not a surprise:

The former attorney for Jeremy Mayfield said he has yet to be paid for defending the suspended NASCAR driver.

We are a nation of dumbasses.

It's amazing the amount of hand-wringing I see about the racing at Talladega. Most of it is stupid or stupider.

We used to complain about webtv users on newsgroups. They were the tards who said stupid stuff that couldn't be refuted because they were so stupid. Now they are on NASCAR message boards.

It can be summed up this way: as long as they race at that track, things are not going to go well. Nobody has a better answer for it or they would have done something already. So shut up, former webtv dumbasses. Go troll for fat girls at Wal-mart if you don't like it.

Hoob.

Fill us in, give us a link or stop typing old man. You're not making any sense.

There are so many far flung bits and pieces of the pot kettle, Jeffy's wife won't be able to find 'em.

I sure would like to hear hoob's take on Danica Patrick possibly joining the team owned by Dale Jr. I chortled when I read that.

Ooooo, NASCAR's newest Shake N BakeTM! I wonder if they'll take turns giving each other the slingshot to see who comes in middle.

Sorry, little buddy. Drunken senior citizens like me shouldn't use computers.

They ride around in a boring parade for the first 450 miles. They start trying at the end. They wreck. People post stupid fixes to this issue on various message boards like:

1. Let 'em race without restrictor plates.
2. Use smaller gears to slow them down.
3. Change the aero package to slow them down.
4. Reconfigure the track, make the banking smaller.
5. Stop racing there.

I think her sponsor is gonna be Jet Ski? Get ready for plenty of bikini pictures. Maybe it's just me, but I'm really not into pictures of 28 year old women with the body of a 5th grader.

Yahoo sports had some caption like "finally together" or somesuch. I guess her husband shouldn't have to worry about her hooking up with Dale since he doesn't like girls.

She will be back in the IRL by 2013.

That's great. So they would rather see a 6 hour parade instead of a 4 hour parade?



That probably makes the most sense. An 11 month season with all but a few tracks getting 2 races is a big part of what's killing the sport.

slow down, there.

I don't get told to slow down by the likes of you, skippy.

Driving a car is not a sport. Shit, it's not really even a skill.

Apparently it is a skill. Please see my "We're All Doomed" thread.

I guess Dick Hicks rubbed one out after today's race since Kurt Busch won. Jimmie Johnson was wrecked on lap 3 and lost some of his points lead.

Kyle's crew was betting on a caution. Must suck to run out of gas when you clearly have the best car.

I don't get told what is or isn't a sport or skill by the likes of you, chief.

I giggle like a little kid when stuff like that happens. I miss the days when motors would suddenly blow on a leader with 3 laps left.

Is he really in any danger? Chances seem kinda slim that he would stumble like this again in the last few races.

He should still win easily. Phoenix is next, and it's not a particularly troublesome track. Plus he is incredibly lucky. I am shocked that this happened to him at Texas.

He really sucked when he went to Miami.

Yeah, that joke was only mildly amusing when Ich posted it a couple of weeks ago, Sweet Walto.

about as exciting as race talk.

Something interesting happened yesterday in the Nationwide race. I hope it'll carry over to today's race.

Brad Keselowski and Denny Hamlin tangled on the track and Denny acted like a douche as usual. We need more of this sort of thing in NASCAR: more people getting punted into the wall, more people acting like douches, and some fighting.

NASCAR needs more douche drivers accusing their step mommies of murder.

They also need randomly-placed land mines on each track.

I think zombie ninjas could do a little something for NASCAR.