Avocados belong to a group of fruits that are climacteric. What do climacteric mean? It means that their ripening is associated with ethylene production. What do ethylene production mean? I'm not really sure, but if you ever get stuck with a batch that just won't seem to ripen you might be able to jump start the process by putting the avocados in a brown paper bag by themselves or together with other climacteric fruits like apples, bananas, and tomatoes.

Do you know how I learned this little handy Heloise-ish hint? This past weekend I joined Costco and bought a bag of 6 avocados. While the perfect dark shade of a ripe green, these dang things are hard as rocks and are not getting softer. I took to the internet and was surprised, nay shocked by all the internet info about Costco avocados and how they suck. I even stumbled upon an entire Reddit thread about the subject. Anyhoo, I bagged them last night with a couple of bananas and stored them in the walk in pantry. That's right, a walk in pantry. I just checked them and 3 of the avocados are pretty soft. 3 are still hard.

I also got a couple of pineapples on the same trip and they were lackluster at best as well. Real duds, I tell ya. I am very disappointed with my produce decisions from Costco. Maybe I will write them a letter.

At any rate, in a related thread note, here's a little pineapple news that I am already aware of but may be a TIL for you, dear reader. I am certain you probably already knew that the pineapple belonged to the Bromeliaceae family, but did you know that the pineapple was adopted by another more salacious family? I am talking about swingers. I'm talking wife swapping. You read that right--swingers, as in "to swing". I'm talkin l'amour. The pineapple and its image is rumored to give these people a heads up that you're bout it bout it. What if this tropical plant, scientific name ananas comosus, is more than just a delicious edible fruit? What if its image, the one you see emblazoned as decor on little yard flags, light fixtures, bath towel insignia, mailbox bling, etc. really is more than just innocent decoration? Think about it and think about the people you know who might own such decorations.

As it pertains to shopping, I hear you are supposed to place your pineapple in your shopping cart upside down. If you see this at your next grocer visit, hit em up and see what happens.

LOL. I sometimes see pineapples on the doorways of some elementary teachers. So far, it's not been anyone I would want to bed down with.

The next time I walk by the first grade at Hoob Elementary I'm going to crack a smile.

So what you're saying is, pineapple aficionados are members of... uh the lifestyle.

I think pineapple on pizza is an abomination, but I've met people who get real mad when I say that.

It's fucking gross. Ham paired/flavored with pineapple is okay, but when you add tomato sauce and bread to the mix it just gets nasty. I don't like sweet pizza.

Not my first choice, but I don't mind it. I wouldn't get mad though. People like different things. Who cares.

Pear/gorgonzola/prosciuto is the way to go for fruity ham pizzas.

You don't belong on the internet with that attitude.

Kinda long but a really interesting article:


The real Lord of the Flies-what happened when 6 boys were shipwrecked for 15 months

exerpt:

But Peter noticed something odd. Peering through his binoculars, he saw burned patches on the green cliffs. “In the tropics it’s unusual for fires to start spontaneously,” he told us, a half century later. Then he saw a boy. Naked. Hair down to his shoulders. This wild creature leaped from the cliffside and plunged into the water. Suddenly more boys followed, screaming at the top of their lungs. It didn’t take long for the first boy to reach the boat. “My name is Stephen,” he cried in perfect English. “There are six of us and we reckon we’ve been here 15 months.”

The boys, once aboard, claimed they were students at a boarding school in Nuku‘alofa, the Tongan capital. Sick of school meals, they had decided to take a fishing boat out one day, only to get caught in a storm. Likely story, Peter thought. Using his two-way radio, he called in to Nuku‘alofa. “I’ve got six kids here,” he told the operator. “Stand by,” came the response. Twenty minutes ticked by. (As Peter tells this part of the story, he gets a little misty-eyed.) Finally, a very tearful operator came on the radio, and said: “You found them! These boys have been given up for dead. Funerals have been held. If it’s them, this is a miracle!”

I think it was around November of last year I decided I wanted to read the Bible cover to cover. I am currently in Ezekiel. It dawned on me that Ezekiel was the book from which Jules would quote before capping someone in Pulp Fiction. His quoted verse in the movie was from 25:17. His quote and the actual passage are not even close to the same.

I learned that about 20 years ago and it turned me off from the Bible. How can Jules be wrong?

FWIW, the Ezekiel Bread verse was verbatim.

He was quoting from the King Jules version.

the b-i-b-l-e is not the book for you?

Forum Bible study!?!?! Set it up, Somey

Shit, I'd be down for that. Nothing like a good religious or political debate to breathe life into this thing. Can we open registration to all the batshit crazy wackos on my FB feed?

TIL about H.L.Mencken (September 12, 1880 – January 29, 1956). I don't think i have ever heard of him. He was a life-long resident of Baltimore, and was an American journalist, satirist, cultural critic and scholar of American English. Known as the "Sage of Baltimore", he is regarded as one of the most influential American writers and prose stylists of the first half of the 20th century. He commented widely on the social scene, literature, music, prominent politicians and contemporary movements. He reveals a lot insight behind a rapier wit, which is a type of wit that is always fun to shoehorn into a sentence. I bet Mike Hunt likes him. I wonder how Mike Hunt is doing. I loved that posteur.

Anyhoo, here is the quote that led me down the rabbit hole:

DID A LITTLE RESEARCH...

Looks like the "narcissistic" part was added for Trump. As far as I can find, the actual quote is:

As democracy is perfected, the office [of president] represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people…On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

https://www.newspapers.com/clip/2183190 ... -1920-the/

Boxer briefs are awesome. I wish I had switched years ago.

Congratulations on graduating from Tighty Whitey U!