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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Oct 21, 2015 4:30 pm 
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My smoke alarm in the kitchen is a pussy. I've changed the batteries 3 times since I moved in. Now I just deal with the chirp. Only takes a day or so to tune it out.

I need a 9v battery for my scale, but I'm not in a big hurry to replace it.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Oct 21, 2015 9:26 pm 
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Sweet Greggo wrote:
My smoke alarm in the kitchen is a pussy. I've changed the batteries 3 times since I moved in. Now I just deal with the chirp. Only takes a day or so to tune it out.


All my smoke alarms are interconnected, so if one goes off eventually they all will start sounding. I had one that kept going off regardless of battery replacement. The only problem was I could never figure out which one, so I replaced all six. The wiring was pretty simple.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2015 1:10 pm 
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Our furnace is gas. It is in what looks like a hall closet. Anyhoo, it did not come on Saturday morning when it was cold and we tried to run the heater. I got it going, that's not the issue. What concerned me is they keep a diagram of the thing inside a plastic sleeve fashioned to the front of the furnace. The plastic thing is covered in black mold. There is also spotted mold on the sheet rock on either side of the furnace. I did not tell the wife. How big of a deal is this? Should I be freaking out? I don't remember seeing mold when I changed the filter. That was probably about 4 mos ago.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2015 2:09 pm 
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I'm no expert, but there are lots of types of mold, and while all are icky, there are only a few types that earn the title of THE BLACK MOLD THAT CAN KILL YOU!!! Just try cleaning it up first with something hardcore from The Home Depot, then see if it comes back. I've had some black mold looking stuff in my house before, usually around windowsills. Some common household cleaner takes care of it. Lowe's is a good place to get that stuff too. The only other option is cover your house in gas and set it on fire. Put the dogs outside first. Whether you want to tell your wife before you do it is up to you.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2015 11:22 pm 
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Try spraying a bleach-water solution on the mold and see if that gets rid of it. Burn your house down before calling in a professional. I guarantee it will be less of a headache.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Thu Dec 17, 2015 9:31 am 
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Only about 25% of my Encore Azaleas are participating in the highly touted fall blooms program.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2016 8:54 am 
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We had a big bug attack a week or two ago. Ants, and those winged kind. I believe they're those carpenter ants and you don't want them. This is the time of year when they swarm and they found a way inside this time. I Raid'd them but called an exterminator just to be safe (yes, I called Terminix.) They sent a guy out and he sprayed all sorts of chemicals outside and some inside. No other problems with ants yet. He also put these little sticky things on the ground in our garage to catch anything else we might have. These are little flat rectangular cardboard pieces about the size of an average shoe. He placed one on each side of the garage just inside the door. He said it'll catch a few bugs but it'll mostly catch grass. If he comes back, he'll look at them and see what else he needs to deal with. Within 24 hours, each trap caught itself a gecko. I don't know if they're actual geckos--they're tan/beige and not green like on TV--but that's what I'm calling them. I have no problem with geckos because, you know, they eat bugs and stay out of the house and don't shit everywhere. I felt bad for these two little guys because that's a bad way to die. They're basically gonna starve to death on those things. The next 24 hours brought two more of their brethren to the traps. One guy had only two legs stuck and was struggling to get away to no avail. I got real skeeved but left him there. He's not moving anymore. No others have shown up since, but I get to look at these things whenever I go get in the car. It creeps me out. I thought it'd catch junebugs and crickets shit, and I can live with that. I'm thinking about throwing them away.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2016 9:54 am 
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I think carpenter ants are those big ass black ants. Are your ants big ass black ones? Mine are. They have been invading my trash bin I keep around the side of the house. Where do you store your trash bin? Anyhoo, this has been the summer of watermelon for the gauchos. A farmers market here has bona fide Mississippi watermelons that are huge and succulent and very delicious. This lot lizard looking sea hag has a booth I always go to and she hooks me up with primo red meat melons. (That's the farmer's market lingo) Anydanghoo, watermelon trash fills up kitchen trash bags quick, real quick. It also gets very heavy. Do you know what else? Watermelon juice gets a lot of watermelon liquid in the bags too. When I sling these bags in the bin sometimes they break and get puddles of watermelon juice errywhere. I also put all the bagged dog poop from the dog walks in those trash bags too. It heats up daily with the watermelon and emits a putrid odor that those ants can't resist. I lifted the lid this morning to the bin to toss another bag o trash and big black ants were all up in that bitch. It startled me. I keep a can of ant killer in my garage and yes, it is the Raid brand with 20% more. It also kills roaches, FYI. I sprayed all of the ants liberally. These ants are warriors and did not die instantly but eventually they succumbed. It was a good death. Do any of you other posters have ant stories to share?


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2016 10:43 am 
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Carpenter ants have wings and if they nest they can do damage like termites do (though they're not as motivated to fuck up your house at termites.) Sounds like just got some super well-fed ants. I'm not a fan of watermelon. The flavor gives me headaches. For real. Can't explain it. I don't like dog poop either.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Jul 27, 2016 9:48 am 
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A girl at work brought in a Watermelon a few years ago from the farm she grew up on in Arkansas. It was so damn good. I still think about that watermelon to this day.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Jul 27, 2016 10:32 am 
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Which employee ate the most of it?

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Jul 27, 2016 1:03 pm 
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cap wrote:
Which employee ate the most of it?

:leroy:


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Jul 27, 2016 3:32 pm 
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I broke the ceramic handle of my favorite coffee mug and super glued that bitch back on this morning. Yes, it was Gorilla Glue. It's tip top again, but it was a messy process. I have dried superglue residue on parts of some of my fingers. It is dominating my thoughts, this crusty feeling, and I don't like it. Do you have any similar experperiences with superglue and what's your favorite brand of s-glue?


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2017 6:05 pm 
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I have installed probably 8-10 ceiling fans in my life and every one of them has been a pain in the ass. Just installed a new one in Titette's room. Everything worked on first try, but hot damn, what a pain in the ass. You need like 4 arms to install one.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Jan 04, 2017 4:15 pm 
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:babyarm: They were easier when they were hook mounts. That new ball socket system made it worse. I do love a good ceiling fan though, and yes, most of mine are Hunter Douglas.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 11:17 am 
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Water heater was leaking on Saturday. I immediately shut all shit down on it and we have not had hot water since. Finally got a new one installed this morning. Now we have hot water again. I've had one shower since Saturday, as we took showers at the in-laws's house Monday night in exchange for a chicken dinner. (Yes, it was Golden Chick.) I'm looking forward to having another shower tonight. My nethers are kinda ripe right now.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 12:16 pm 
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Fucking love Golden Chick hot spice


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 12:38 pm 
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:babyarm: Chicken Express has the spice packet now, but it's not as good as Golden Chick's.

The water heater is the most puzzling of all home repairs: It's typically not all that expensive (I think my last one was bought and installed for less than $1k), but it can be the biggest pain in the ass if it gets all over the house.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 1:13 pm 
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Spaz wrote:
Fucking love Golden Chick hot spice

:babyarm: Spicy tenders and a cup of that raspberry lemonade they have...fast-food lunch doesn't get much better than that.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 1:20 pm 
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bigboy wrote:
:babyarm: Chicken Express has the spice packet now, but it's not as good as Golden Chick's.

The water heater is the most puzzling of all home repairs: It's typically not all that expensive (I think my last one was bought and installed for less than $1k), but it can be the biggest pain in the ass if it gets all over the house.

I didn't wanna risk flood damage so that's why I shut the shit down. This heater was going on its 15th year so it was time to replace anyway. We asked about tankless but the guy said since we have a 2-story house (:bigtime:) there'd be problems with holes in walls and somesuch. They'll work if you're building or maybe remodeling, but adding one to a 2-story isn't a great idea apparently. So it's another big horkin' tank but this time with a programmable display thingy. And still all for around $1k.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 10:11 pm 
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Tit Whistle wrote:
So it's another big horkin' tank but this time with a programmable display thingy. And still all for around $1k.


Is it an "Internet of Things" device?


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2017 1:31 pm 
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Tit Whistle wrote:
Spaz wrote:
Fucking love Golden Chick hot spice

:babyarm: Spicy tenders and a cup of that raspberry lemonade they have...fast-food lunch doesn't get much better than that.


Supposedly it is just a repackaged version of this: https://www.jesshall.com/collections/se ... soned-salt

I have purchased some and will report back later


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2017 1:33 pm 
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Tit Whistle wrote:
bigboy wrote:
:babyarm: Chicken Express has the spice packet now, but it's not as good as Golden Chick's.

The water heater is the most puzzling of all home repairs: It's typically not all that expensive (I think my last one was bought and installed for less than $1k), but it can be the biggest pain in the ass if it gets all over the house.

I didn't wanna risk flood damage so that's why I shut the shit down. This heater was going on its 15th year so it was time to replace anyway. We asked about tankless but the guy said since we have a 2-story house (:bigtime:) there'd be problems with holes in walls and somesuch. They'll work if you're building or maybe remodeling, but adding one to a 2-story isn't a great idea apparently. So it's another big horkin' tank but this time with a programmable display thingy. And still all for around $1k.


Our HWH is ok at the moment. It gets hot water, but not a lot of it. Means Mrs. Spaz can't take a hot bath and that's a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiig problem. We've got a Home Shield since it's a new house, so we had someone out. They said we should "drain it to get the calcium deposits out" or whatever. However, when we tried draining it, it just leaks out the house. Luckily, my Father in Law is a plumber and is coming out in March to help us fix it.

This is a great story and you loved it. Everyone stood up and it was a 15 minute standing ovation after hearing it


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2017 2:28 pm 
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Spaz wrote:
Tit Whistle wrote:
bigboy wrote:
:babyarm: Chicken Express has the spice packet now, but it's not as good as Golden Chick's.

The water heater is the most puzzling of all home repairs: It's typically not all that expensive (I think my last one was bought and installed for less than $1k), but it can be the biggest pain in the ass if it gets all over the house.

I didn't wanna risk flood damage so that's why I shut the shit down. This heater was going on its 15th year so it was time to replace anyway. We asked about tankless but the guy said since we have a 2-story house (:bigtime:) there'd be problems with holes in walls and somesuch. They'll work if you're building or maybe remodeling, but adding one to a 2-story isn't a great idea apparently. So it's another big horkin' tank but this time with a programmable display thingy. And still all for around $1k.


Our HWH is ok at the moment. It gets hot water, but not a lot of it. Means Mrs. Spaz can't take a hot bath and that's a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiig problem. We've got a Home Shield since it's a new house, so we had someone out. They said we should "drain it to get the calcium deposits out" or whatever. However, when we tried draining it, it just leaks out the house. Luckily, my Father in Law is a plumber and is coming out in March to help us fix it.

This is a great story and you loved it. Everyone stood up and it was a 15 minute standing ovation after hearing it

I can't wait for the sequel.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2017 4:01 pm 
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bigboy wrote:
:babyarm: Chicken Express has the spice packet now, but it's not as good as Golden Chick's.

The water heater is the most puzzling of all home repairs: It's typically not all that expensive (I think my last one was bought and installed for less than $1k), but it can be the biggest pain in the ass if it gets all over the house.



/que vivaldi


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2017 11:17 am 
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queue

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2017 11:18 am 
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I miss Mr Queue.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2017 11:20 am 
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Tit Whistle wrote:
I miss Mr Queue.


Wait in this line here for him to return.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2017 4:45 pm 
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Missssssssssster Queue!!!!!!!!!!!!

:twirl:


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2017 11:52 am 
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I planted a dogwood tree last weekend (pink, not white) and broke a sprinkler head in the process. Actually the sprinkler head was ok it was actually a 90 degree elbow piece that screwed into the sprinkler head. The other end went inside flex pipe. That's right, flex pipe. It's my first irrigation system with flex pipe. All the other ones used pvc pipe. Do you have flex pipe? It's very easy to work with but I'm wondering if I should've used a clamp after inserting the new replacement for extra strengthness. Would you have used a clamp in this situation and what's your preferred irrigation piping?


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2018 10:55 am 
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The water heater (which I don't understand why people call it the hot water heater, that's redundant) busted the other day and flooded the living room. Naturally the cost to replace/repair everything is just at our deductible so looks I get to lie to my kids about Christmas.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2018 12:18 pm 
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Diello wrote:
The water heater (which I don't understand why people call it the hot water heater, that's redundant) busted the other day and flooded the living room.


I just had mine replaced. Original was installed in '03 so I guess it held up okay. The installer had to bring everything up to code, including installing a pan that catches leaky water and drains it to the garage. They also come with a ginormous controller on the front now so I have to cut a hole on the inside of my door to make it fit.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2018 3:57 pm 
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Built a firepit with a little stone patio around it in the backyard. Took about a month to finish what with all the rain. I never want to do physical labor ever again.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Mon Oct 08, 2018 3:40 pm 
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Do you do your own pest control spraying or call in an exterminator? I've been feeling empowered after winning a nearly month long battle with pantry months, aka Indian meal moths. Those bastards were relentless.

Now I'm looking to take the fight to spiders.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Mon Oct 08, 2018 6:47 pm 
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A couple of years ago, I started using something called Cy-Kick CS because of my hatred of scorpions. It has stopped a bunch of other problems I was having with flying and crawling things.

I retreat it every 90 days or so. That reminds me. It's time to do it again.


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Tue Oct 09, 2018 9:49 pm 
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Once upon a time old unca Greggo spent a year as an exterminator (or "Hired Killer" as my 18 year old self called me). The work my company had was mainly apartment contracts. I would visit a complex once a week and treat the units in a couple of buildings. I'd usually visit 4-5 complexes a day. Occasionally I get called to treat a house. Over the course of that year I was probably in and out of five thousand apartments. I seent it all, man. The pristine condos at 4242 Cedar Springs where only the finest of the FAHBuless lived, the nasty apartments off of Throckmorton where the T-R-A-S-H-Y FAHBulous lived, the disgusting places off of Jim Miller where it LITRUHLY RAINED COCKROACHES on me, and the ethnically diverse apartments in Arlington where you could tell who lived there just by the food smell that was embedded in the walls. I was hit on by way too many dudes (they love a guy in uniform, what can I say) and several womens (some meh, a couple heyyyy). I crawled under muddy houses treating the piers for termites, flooded fire ant mounds with 20 gallons of poison at a time, attended ridiculous seminars, and sweat my ass off in the Texas heat in an Izuzu P'up with no air conditioning. All for $4.00/hr (no experience necessary!). After a year I said fuckit and got a job as a phone operator that place collect calls for people in hotels and jail.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 7:02 am 
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You still doing that?

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 11:58 am 
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"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"
"ITI operator, this is Greg, how do you wish to pay for your call?"

:dead:

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 1:25 pm 
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I treat the house on my own about once a year with Home Defense or something along those lines and I hit the yard with triazicide for ants . I've called in a professional a couple of times for out of control carpenter ants in window frames. Treating them on my own kills them a few at a time but they come back without the professional treatment. I always fear the termite infestation. Our house was treated for them years before we moved in and everyone recommended we get the annual inspection and update, but we were so dirt ass poor that I never did it once we moved in.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2018 11:56 am 
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Joined: Wed Sep 28, 2005 5:53 pm
Posts: 17382
Location: moving mountains
The lady I bought my house from kept an "English Garden" in the back yard. Half of it was a nice carpet of St Augustine, the back half was a hodgepodge of god-knows-what. Different trees (all with multiple trunks), grasses, flowers, etc. Even though my preference is a "mostly grass" backyard, we kept the overgrowth for a couple of years because we were too lazy to change it out. Last year I let most of it die and pulled/mowed the rest of it down. I've cut down a couple of trees and REALLY want to cut down 3 or 4 more. Eventually I will.

When I cut everything down I was expecting the St Augustine to start taking over the area, but this year it actually regressed a bit. I'm thinking of putting in a different grass, one that will be tough enough to live in the shade of the oak tree and choke out the rest of the crap back there.

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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Mon Oct 22, 2018 10:33 pm 
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Joined: Wed Sep 28, 2005 4:57 pm
Posts: 7484
I suck at most things home improvement, but in this age of using You Tube to figure out anything, I'm starting to branch out. Tonight I replaced a light switch that had been broken for the entire 15 years we've lived in our house. One of the switches wouldn't stay in the off position without a piece of tape holding it down. I managed to replace both switches and the gang plate without shocking myself or burning the house down. My next project is to tackle some of the shitty electrical outlets. After that, look out. I'll probably knock out a wall and put on a whole new wing. Gonna wire it 220 or 221. Whatever it takes.

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"She could sell you a house then give you the dripping cock hole after you pummeled her in the fart box and that pile of Arby's meat that she calls a pussy." - DK, 2004


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 Post subject: Re: Terd's home improvement blog
PostPosted: Tue Oct 23, 2018 2:23 pm 
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Joined: Wed Sep 09, 2009 6:07 pm
Posts: 3032
Location: these things are good....
I set the blade for the lawnmower a little lower last Sunday for the yard cleanup and accidentally hit the PVC sewer cleanout cap. Dang. Do y'all still mow your own lawns? Probably not is my guess. I'm usually the oldest and whitest guy in every neighborhood I've lived in that still does. I guess that makes me the last of the mow-hicans in that regard. Anydanghoo, the cap was shattered to smithereens. I had to go to Lowe's and buy a replacement PVC cap. The cap was a 4" one. I measured it with a Stanley tape measure :bigtime: before going. Total bill was <$5. When I got back home I had to remove the broken cap piece out by carefully unscrewing it in a counterclockwise fashion. Once that piece was extracted, I meticulously lined up the threads and screwed the new cap in its place. Voila.

*handyman tip: when confronted with screwing/unscrewing applications remember "lefty loosie, righty tighty"


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