Tell you to get it started?
Get it started, cap.
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| Fiber http://removerowdy.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=4296 |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Mon Oct 26, 2009 3:07 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Fiber |
It really helps you poop. It can also give you some nasty flesh-eating farts. I may need a new chair soon. |
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| Author: | cap [ Mon Oct 26, 2009 3:31 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
it also gives you faster internet |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Mon Oct 26, 2009 3:35 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Don't mention that in front of Sagger. He'll get pissy about Verizon again. |
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| Author: | fruitdog [ Mon Oct 26, 2009 3:41 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
how do you imbibe your fiber? bran muffin, cereal or fiber one |
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| Author: | Stu [ Mon Oct 26, 2009 3:58 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
cud |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Mon Oct 26, 2009 3:58 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
I had a bowl of Fiber One cereal this morning, then a couple Metamucil wafers after lunch. HO-LEE SHIT! I just had to step outside the building to blow a few mighty blasts. I was appalled yet giggling at the same time. I'm taking all this stuff to try to lower meh cholesterol, which hasn't been diagnosed, but I can only assume is through the fucking roof. |
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| Author: | Sweet Greggo [ Mon Oct 26, 2009 4:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
A big ass bowl of raisin bran before bed will have you running to the shitter as soon as you wake up in the morning. If you have time, it's a good idea to light a few candles and some incense before you open the bombay doors. |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:37 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
My bowels continue to be pummeled as I have now taken meh 3rd PowerDump within a 24-hour period and I am consistently muffling elephant farts into meh chair. Another bowl of cereal worked its magic this morning. I'll have another dosage of Metamucil wafers with lunch. Should make for an interesting 2:00 project meeting. I'm enjoying this. |
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| Author: | fruitdog [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:12 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
are they stinky? |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:15 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Sometimes. Usually they're just loud and oddly-shaped. Still trying to gauge whether yesterday's hydrogen bombs were due to the Metamucil or Sunday's Taco Cabana lunch. |
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| Author: | Trained Goucho [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:28 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
are the stools softening? |
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| Author: | bigboy [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Sweet Greggo wrote: A big ass bowl of raisin bran before bed will have you running to the shitter as soon as you wake up in the morning. If you have time, it's a good idea to light a few candles and some incense before you open the bombay doors. Mumbai |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:03 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Trained Goucho wrote: are the stools softening? No LiquiShit(TM) yet. |
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| Author: | TerdFerguson [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:43 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Tit Whistle wrote: My bowels continue to be pummeled as I have now taken meh 3rd PowerDump within a 24-hour period and I am consistently muffling elephant farts into meh chair. Another bowl of cereal worked its magic this morning. I'll have another dosage of Metamucil wafers with lunch. Should make for an interesting 2:00 project meeting. I'm enjoying this. Is this some sort of cleanse that you are on? |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:44 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
TerdFerguson wrote: Tit Whistle wrote: My bowels continue to be pummeled as I have now taken meh 3rd PowerDump within a 24-hour period and I am consistently muffling elephant farts into meh chair. Another bowl of cereal worked its magic this morning. I'll have another dosage of Metamucil wafers with lunch. Should make for an interesting 2:00 project meeting. I'm enjoying this. Is this some sort of cleanse that you are on? Trying to lower cholesterol. |
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| Author: | vbear [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 12:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Tit Whistle wrote: TerdFerguson wrote: Tit Whistle wrote: My bowels continue to be pummeled as I have now taken meh 3rd PowerDump within a 24-hour period and I am consistently muffling elephant farts into meh chair. Another bowl of cereal worked its magic this morning. I'll have another dosage of Metamucil wafers with lunch. Should make for an interesting 2:00 project meeting. I'm enjoying this. Is this some sort of cleanse that you are on? Trying to lower cholesterol. |
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| Author: | Sweet Greggo [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 12:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Tit Whistle wrote: TerdFerguson wrote: Tit Whistle wrote: My bowels continue to be pummeled as I have now taken meh 3rd PowerDump within a 24-hour period and I am consistently muffling elephant farts into meh chair. Another bowl of cereal worked its magic this morning. I'll have another dosage of Metamucil wafers with lunch. Should make for an interesting 2:00 project meeting. I'm enjoying this. Is this some sort of cleanse that you are on? Trying to lower cholesterol. Your coworkers called and asked me to tell you to just try cutting out the eggs and quit shitting in your pants all over the office. |
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| Author: | TerdFerguson [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Tit Whistle wrote: TerdFerguson wrote: Tit Whistle wrote: My bowels continue to be pummeled as I have now taken meh 3rd PowerDump within a 24-hour period and I am consistently muffling elephant farts into meh chair. Another bowl of cereal worked its magic this morning. I'll have another dosage of Metamucil wafers with lunch. Should make for an interesting 2:00 project meeting. I'm enjoying this. Is this some sort of cleanse that you are on? Trying to lower cholesterol. Shitting lowers one's cholesterol? I'm healthy as an ox then. |
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| Author: | cap [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
but it raises your blood pressure. |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:22 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
The fiber is the only way to clear out the bad cholesterol that's in you right now. I still gotta change meh diet and exercise on occasion or it'll stay high. I'll probably just consume more fiber since shitting > exercising. |
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| Author: | TerdFerguson [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:48 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
So let's say you successfully lower your cholesterol and lose weight. When people ask you how you were able to do it, you going to tell them "I just took a bunch of shits"? VBF would be skinny if that was the case. |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:56 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Not "a bunch of shits", but "the right kind of shits". |
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| Author: | cap [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:57 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
i think i just lowered my cholesterol by 100 a few minutes ago |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:57 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Of course, I heard all this information second hand, so it might not work. But since I'm shitting and farting at a greater clip, I don't mind. |
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| Author: | or somesuch [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 2:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Sounds like someone's gearing up for softball season. |
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| Author: | cap [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 4:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
you know what to do |
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| Author: | or somesuch [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 4:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Tell you to get it started? Get it started, cap. |
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| Author: | Sweet Greggo [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 5:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Tit Whistle wrote: Of course, I heard all this information second hand, so it might not work. But since I'm shitting and farting at a greater clip, I don't mind. How do you know if it works or not? You said you didn't have your cholesterol checked first so there's no way to know for sure. Fiber is good for some laughs though, so I endorse your new diet. Make sure you include the kids and play "pull my finger". |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 6:50 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Sweet Greggo wrote: Tit Whistle wrote: Of course, I heard all this information second hand, so it might not work. But since I'm shitting and farting at a greater clip, I don't mind. How do you know if it works or not? You said you didn't have your cholesterol checked first so there's no way to know for sure. Fiber is good for some laughs though, so I endorse your new diet. Make sure you include the kids and play "pull my finger". Yeah, I admit I pretty much have no clue what I'm doing. |
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| Author: | jim jack [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 7:04 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Include these: Grape juice that is 100 percent grapes, not 100 percent juice. A handful of almonds a day. Try to get the unsalted type. I can see you now on Oprah, talking about the new "fartabunch" diet. |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 7:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
I'm afraid 100% grape juice will give me baboon butt. |
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| Author: | rowdyhatinwalt [ Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:40 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Tit Whistle wrote: I'm afraid 100% grape juice will give me baboon butt. Don't ask me about what I think fried chicken and big red soda will do to me. |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:22 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
rowdyhatinwalt wrote: Tit Whistle wrote: I'm afraid 100% grape juice will give me baboon butt. Don't ask me about what I think fried chicken and big red soda will do to me. *notices green cloud over Garland* I think we can all guess. |
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| Author: | rowdyhatinwalt [ Wed Oct 28, 2009 7:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Tit Whistle wrote: rowdyhatinwalt wrote: Tit Whistle wrote: I'm afraid 100% grape juice will give me baboon butt. Don't ask me about what I think fried chicken and big red soda will do to me. *notices green cloud over Garland* I think we can all guess. well, now I have a weird feeling that I need jheri curl stuff on my head. |
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| Author: | Trained Goucho [ Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:42 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Dear Tit, Inspired by your testimonial, I picked up a box of Fiber One honey clusters yesterday and took your challenge. I don't really care about cholesterol, I just really enjoy a good poop. In all honesty, it's better than sex. I found the lightly sweentened whole grain flakes with honey clusters to be not only delcious, but quite the catalyst in triggering an epic shit storm. Did you know this selection has a whopping 13 grams of fiber which is 51% of the daily value? That's quite an invitation for the captain to dance, I don't have to tell you. At any rate, I am very pleased with the results and endorse your system. |
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| Author: | Tit Whistle [ Mon Nov 02, 2009 2:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
I continue to eat Fiber One for breakfast each morning, and on Saturday managed 4 monster dumps in a 24-hour period. Don't forget trying the Metamucil wafers as a snack. Though I no longer use them, they are tasty and take your pooper to a higher level of production. Metamucil is like Slick 50 for your colon. It's that good. |
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| Author: | Stu [ Mon Nov 02, 2009 5:14 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
I always poop twice on game days. |
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| Author: | or somesuch [ Mon Nov 02, 2009 5:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Trained Goucho wrote: At any rate, I am very pleased with the results and endorse your system. Did you not know already that fiber gives you better poops? I don't think this is Tit's system. This is commonly known. |
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| Author: | Trained Goucho [ Mon Nov 02, 2009 6:52 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
or somesuch wrote: Trained Goucho wrote: At any rate, I am very pleased with the results and endorse your system. Did you not know already that fiber gives you better poops? I don't think this is Tit's system. This is commonly known. everybody knows about fiber. i was crediting Tit more for Fiber One. they used to only have that shit cereal that looks like canned chow mein noodles, but they've really updated their cereal portfolio. |
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| Author: | Sweet Greggo [ Mon Nov 02, 2009 6:58 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
Trained Goucho wrote: or somesuch wrote: Trained Goucho wrote: At any rate, I am very pleased with the results and endorse your system. Did you not know already that fiber gives you better poops? I don't think this is Tit's system. This is commonly known. everybody knows about fiber. i was crediting Tit more for Fiber One. they used to only have that shit cereal that looks like canned chow mein noodles, but they've really updated their cereal portfolio. whoa whoa whoa. you talkin' smack to somey? |
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| Author: | Diello [ Mon Nov 02, 2009 8:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
No, he's talking shit to somey. |
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| Author: | Sweet Greggo [ Mon Nov 02, 2009 8:31 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Fiber |
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